The Beer Bored

What or who is the beer bored? Unlike the appointed governmental body that holds reign over those who choose to engage in the questionable practice of peddling intoxicating beverages under 6.3 % alcohol (in Tennessee), the beer bored are those who are tired of pedestrian beers. That's not to say that members of the beer bored don't appreciate a good session beer or a refreshing light lager every now and then,- there is a time and place for the comfort of beers.  Romance novels are a dime a dozen, but there is only one Romeo and Juliet. A million picaresque heros have  entertained us in literature and film but there is only one Huckleberry Finn or to a much lesser extent Joel Goodson (Risky Business). What makes these superlative examples so extraordinary is not just quality- it is the creative endeavor of the author to craft something that is not only of high quality but also unique.  

The beer bored (sometimes referred to in derogatory terms as Beer Geeks) are greatly excited about the creative possibilities of beer. The beer bored go straight to the strangest, most unlikely, amalgamation of flavors on tap. Beer bored members literally vibrate with anticipation at the prospect of experiencing a peanut butter and bacon beer, a oak aged chipotle peppermint porter, a sour elderberry and muscadine Kriek, a cedar infused moroccan tobacco brown, a kumquat I.P.A., or a date and cinnamon braggot. Sometimes, the execution of these creative formulas do not result in the transcendent and vividly the imagined taste experience the beer bored anticipate Never mind- the thrill is in the hunt, and the experience will be retold in glowing or less than glowing terms as a uniquely personal event. For a brief moment, the beer bored became beer excited and inclusive to the creative process. This experience is not unique to beer but could apply to almost any creative discipline including literature, dramatic arts, visual arts, cigar rolling  or coffee roasting. Perhaps the psychoactive actives of alcohol contribute to the a larger population of beer bored, but the population of beer bored are growing at an exponential rate. Some even become nascent brewery owners.

On the other side of the coin, there will always be those who appreciate not being challenged with the unique and unusual and resent these affronts to their comfort zone. In some sense, these individuals do not experience boredom as the beer bored know this emotional state. Instead, these individuals (who also form groups) may feel threatened by unpredictability of the creative process and the weird ones who engage in that process.These will figuratively kick the crap out of the creative process until they see a clear payment schedule and promise to cease and desist. These do not care to participate. These do not care to understand. These do not care to listen. These have a tight schedule. These are firm believers in the clarity of black and white, and in fact, have come to doubt the existence of gray.  Often these are in positions of power and can destroy a creative enterprise with a sweep of their pen. Luckily for the weird and beer bored a small  percentage are members of the other party. Some can be pacified by a contrite nature and may appreciate a seeming conversion to the logical religion of  regulation.

The battle lines are drawn.

The beer bored and the breweries who contribute to their quest require weapons to defend against those enemies who would actively or  passively contribute to their demise. But this goes to a much bigger picture-It's not just the elimination of boredom that is at stake. The ability of any artist, craftsman, and small business owner to take creative risk relies on the support of the audience/customer. Would we rather view sunflower and sunshine hotel art? Do we prefer the consistency and long shelf of processed foods? Is generic watery beer the bomb? Will Chattanooga become a little weird or obsess over the regulation of food trucks and same sex benefits. 

 In the black and white world of the weird phobic, the beer content, and uncaring bureaucrat   the god given ability of the weird to articulate is useless. Money is useful. Paid professionals-lawyers, architects, electricians, and politicians are useful. Volunteers are useful. Money is useful. Money is useful. M-O- N -E -Y is useful. Look at the creative enterprises that have prospered in chattanooga. They had grants, backers, loans, public support and sometimes all four. It sucks. I know. It is counterintuitive to the creative process. No one wants to claim it accept the most fervent pure capitalist, but it's a fact of life.

At Moccasin Bend Brewery we spent money on architects and engineers and tried to quietly improve a situation we inherited. We also spent money on the production of beer, beer taxes and a millon other necessary expenses. We created a business savings account and saved in anticipation of a fiscal emergency. That emergency happened on friday January 31st around 9 p.m. Our situation is detailed on our facebook page. The bottom line is we continued to spend on all the regular expenses plus additional expenses to correct electrical and fire issues with very little revenue. So far, we have covered all of February and are now into the first week of March. Money is becoming tight and we have launched a kickstarter to help save our little brewery. But we're not crying in our beer, we've been overwhelmed with financial and emotional support through our kickstarter campaign and if you would like to contribute you can here:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/chrishunt/moccasin-bend-brewing-company-reopening?ref=home_location

Enough of our sob story, we love puns and minor jabs at the powers that be and that is why, upon re-opening our business we will be forming a collective body called The Beer Bored. The beer bored will consist of five members. We will be immediately accepting nominations- send them to bendbrewing@yahoo.com or message us through facebook. upon re-opening 3% of our monthly gross will go to fund the beer bored. In turn, the beer bored will vote on the funding of artistic projects or projects that promote tolerance and inclusivity or both. The will focus will be on St. Elmo but not exclusive to St. Elmo.
We are immensely grateful to our weird, beer bored and we will support them. The battle lines are drawn and we've chosen a side. The future-she's a clear (and bright) one